Monday, October 1, 2012

Laser Eyes

I would love to have laser eyes so much. I don't think I would use them for anything too out of the ordinary, but they would make normal life exponentially more fun. I'm not sure if I'd rather have little thin beams that burn / melt stuff, or more Scott Summers style wide beams that destroy stuff. I know Cyclops doesn't actually fire lasers; they're some kind of concussion blast, but you get the idea. It would be awesome to be able to control the width and power of the beams, so as to be able to blow things up, and also do normal things. Something that annoys me is when I have a cup of hot coffee or something, but I'm doing something important, like reading comic books, playing video games, or writing a post, and I forget about my drink, then I don't want to walk to the microwave to heat it back up to an ideal drinking temperature, since that would mean I have to temporarily stop doing whatever important thing I'm doing. I would much rather just laser it since aside from requiring less time and less walking, lasers are fun. I doubt I would do anything truly evil with laser vision, but I can see myself abusing the power a little bit. Every time I saw a candle, a match, or anything like that, I would feel a need to light it. But I feel like most of all, I would overuse it for food. Putting cold water into an instant noodle cup, then lasering it, cooking marshmallows, making the hot beverage that I would later forget about and relaser, that kind of thing. Also, lasers are a great way to amuse oneself when bored. I would do things like evaporate large amounts of water, or burn through a stack of paper, or carve stuff into roads and sidewalks. Hopefully, I'd be able to turn the power way down, so if I lasered a person without wanting to do any real damage, I could. That's the other way I would abuse my laser powers. A conversation might go something like this:
Annoying Person Who Is Not Me: "Ow! Did you just laser me?!"
Me: "... Uhhh ..... no ......"
APWINM: "You did, didn't you?"
Me: ".... maybe ...."
APWINM: "Stop doing that!"
Me: "EAT LASER!!!!"
*continues to shoot lasers*
APWINM: *runs away*
But that would only happen with someone who was really, really bothering me. I usually have more self control than that, but it might happen once in a while. Laser vision would also give me a reason to finally set up a secret training room in my basement, with targets to laser, and once I got good enough, mirrors to do trick shots off of. Yeah, laser vision would be cool.

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